False Idols Halloween Show Tonight! We talk to The Pixes, Madonna, The White Stripes, The Mummies and organizer Bob Geldof
How many of you folks paid top dollar to see Madonna last night? Well now, don’t you feel a little dumb? Yeah, because tonight at The Continental Club and Big Top you can see Madge and a whole host of other amazing acts like The Pixies, The White Stripes, Kate Bush, The Mummies, and the Buzzcocks. And all for a mere $5 or $10!!! Fools! [ ed. - Actually, it's Young Mammals, Wild Moccains, The Whit Strips, LIMB, Mikey and the Drags, and Wicked Poseur playing as those bands but we didn't have the heart to tell him ] Omar told me he had connections with all these acts and so he put me in touch with organizer Bob Geldof [ ed. - Actually, that was just Joe Mathlete's e-mail ] who in turn put me in contact with all the acts, most of whom had time to respond to a variety of questions I’d always wanted to ask them. Here are there responses.
The Pixies [ ed - Young Mammals]
She’s from Ohio
Riding the tide of the River Euphrates
Totez.
Madonna [ ed - The Wild Moccasins]
53 dancers. 50 men. 3 women. all working hard, but unemployed.
You are speaking to 80’s- early 90’s Madonna so I don’t know what you are talking about yet.
Guy Ritchie is said to have compared sex with you to cuddling with Gristle. As a G.I. Joe villains go, he’s…well, I could see where that would be unpleasant ( see ) but if you were going to compare Madonna sex to GI Joe sex, which Cobra villain would you choose?
Well, I have a confession to make.. This is an embarrassing question for me, because I’ve actually already had a fling with a Cobra. A couple years back I met Dr. Mindbender while filming the Borderline music video. He wound up being cast as my Hispanic love interest and very soon there were sparks on and off the set..Unfortunately during the filming there was a dispute between the director & Dr. Mindbender because of artistic differences. Words were exchanged and ultimately Mindbender was cut from the video and replaced by John “Jellybean” Benitez whom you see now in the video. I haven’t seen him since, but I hope he’s happy wherever he is.
I will be lip-syncing 98% of the set, but he can get up and vogue whenever he’d like.
The White Stripes [ ed -The White Strips aka Mlee Marie of Hearts of Animals and Chris Cascio]
Madonna is likely going to have some dancers and stuff but you guys actually had your music used for a ballet. Are you guys going to bring over the Royal Ballet and one-up Madonna?
No, we are the minimalist kings and queens and we will keep it that way, thank you very much. Blues rock needeth no damn dancers.
Plastic button guitars? Surely you jest. Seven nation army would have been better used in a yogurt commercial, see: http://www.rollingstone.com/music/videos/jack-white-sings-about-yogurt-with-stephen-colbert-20110622
Yep.
The Mummies [ed - Mikey and the Drags]
You don’t need comfort when you have Rock and Roll!! We’re coming in full costume!!
What kind of question is that?!?! You can’t have one without the other!!!
No…. Can we party at your house???
Or ganizer Bob Geldof [ed - Joe Mathlete]
Way fewer assholes and British people. Infinity percent more Lone Star. Chances of ending world hunger via the power of rock and roll: same.
I grew bored with pseudo-fascism years ago; I used the money I got from Live Aid (which obviously didn’t go to feeding starving African children, did anybody really believe that?) to equip and train a standing army. So far all they do is march, salute my image and sing a few Boomtown Rats songs, but we’re working up to invading Wales. Wish us luck!
I merely showed him how to masturbate while strangling himself. At most, that’s second-degree manslaughter.
Morrisey called Do they Know It’s Christmas? “tuneless” and “the most self-righteous platform ever in the history of popular music” … he’s kind of a dick, isn’t he?
Morrissey is a fat vegetarian.
<a href="http://www.vimeo.com/51736418">http://www.vimeo.com/51736418</a>
Friday, October 26
False Idols: The Halloweening, featuring Young Mammals as The Pixies, The Wild Moccasins as Madonna, The White Strips as The White Stripes, LIMB & Pals as Kate Bush, Mikey and The Drags as The Mummies, Wicked Poseur as The Buzzcocks
DJ ADR, Little Joe Washington, & more
@ The Continental Club, The Big Top
$10, $5 with costume, Doors 7pm, 21+